Everyone wants to be happy. Right? That's kind of a 'no-brainer' statement. But how many people really are? Unfortunately, not everyone. So, what is the secret to happiness? Well, if I had a magic potion for it, then I would sell it ... and be a very rich woman. But I don't. All I have is this - my words of inspiration. In order to be happy, we need to have a positive mindset. For some people, this comes naturally. But for others, it doesn't. For instance, have you ever wondered why some people have the ability to stay happy regardless of what life throws their way ... while others could be billionaires and still be miserable? While I'm not a happiness researcher, I do know that there are several components to happiness. One is genetics. And another is the environment in which you grew up (nature and nurture). The real question is - which came first? Are some people happy because they were born that way? Or are they happy because they were taught how to be happy? Ahhhh ... that is the age-old question. But I'm not here to solve that mystery. I'm here to write a blog. Anyway, I was lucky enough to be born into a family of optimists. In fact, as my stepmom (who is a psychologist) pointed out, sometimes we are too optimistic. For example, she explained to me that sometimes my Dad was so positive that he ignored the problems that needed to be solved. I would tend to agree with that. But regardless of whether that trait is good or bad, I still feel like I am fortunate. Whether or not I won the 'genetic happiness lottery', I do know for a fact that from an early age, I was taught a positive way of thinking. I watched my parents' behavior, and I adopted their happiness habits. Don't get me wrong, I have gone through my share of rough times - just like everyone. But I think I have learned some habits to stay happy that I can share with you. Here are a select few: 1. Keep a gratitude journal. Too many people focus on what they don't have. They are in a perpetual mental state of "I want more ... I want better ... I am not satisfied ..." This is not gratitude. Not that wanting to improve your life is a bad thing. Of course not! But improving your life starts with appreciating what you already have. If you rolled your eyes in embarrassment because you saw yourself in that quotation of "I'm not satisfied," then listen up. If you have a roof over your head, food on your table, and a bed to sleep on, then you are more fortunate than most of the world's population. So get out a notebook and make a habit out of writing down the things that you are grateful for every day - big or "small." I put quotation marks around that word because there is no such thing as small. Even the privilege to breathe air easily or drink clean water are are not "small." I should know about the first one, since I have asthma. Ha. :) 2. Monitor your thoughts. Most people have no idea how many negative thoughts go through their mind on a constant basis. Are you one of them? When is the last time you paid attention to your thoughts? It's probably been a long time - if ever (for some people). So take the time to recognize your negative thoughts and write them down in a separate notebook (not your gratitude journal). Then ... 3. Re-frame what happens to you. Take a look at your negative thoughts that you wrote down and then write out why they are not valid. If you said something like, "I'm fat." Well, "fat" is a relative term. You may be "fat" compared to a supermodel, but not compared to a lot of people in the world. Remember, your thoughts are only that - thoughts. Thoughts are not necessarily facts. When you understand that, then you can re-frame life a in a positive way. 4.Choose positive people to spend your time with. You have probably heard the statements, "Birds of a feather flock together" or "You are who you spend the most time with." That certainly can be true. So if you find yourself surrounded with "Energy Vampires," spend less time with them - if you can. You know who the Energy Vampires are ... they suck the life out of you and contribute nothing positive in return. Some of the Energy Vampires might be family members, so that is a bummer. And a lot more difficult. But as much as possible, choose to surround yourself with positive people. Like I said, I don't have the patent on the magic potion of happiness (I sure wish I did!). But if you are someone who was born into a family of pessimists, or if you think that you were born with a set of genetics that predisposes you to negativity, try these things. Nothing is hopeless. You can always adopt new habits to make your life happy if you want it badly enough! I will leave you with a link to one of my new ventures - my "Mini Motivational Message." It's a short, 1-2 minute podcast with a quick thought to help you be happier! I have videos coming soon as well ... :) Here is my first Mini Motivational Message about 'Negative Payoffs' ... https://soundcloud.com/carol-morgan-ph-d/negative-payoffs And follow me me on Sound Cloud for more ... https://soundcloud.com/carol-morgan-ph-d Cheers! To your happiness!! :)
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For this week's blog, I am going to share a condensed version of my latest (and the most popular) article on Lifehack.org: 20 Signs You Are Succeeding In Life Even If You Don't Feel You Are. So far, it's been shared 208,000 times on social media. To me, that means that people are dying to be told that that they are doing well in life (either that or I'm a really good writer! ha!). :) I'm so happy that this article has been so well received and touched so many people. So just in case you didn't get a chance to see it, I thought I would give you some of the highlights here: We all feel like failures from time to time. While this is a normal feeling, you have to find a way to see yourself and your life from a different perspective. Sometimes we ignore the “little things.” Just because you are not a millionaire, don’t live in a mansion, and you don’t drive a fancy car, that doesn’t mean you’re a failure. In fact, it’s quite the contrary. Here are 5 signs that you are succeeding in life: 1. You have raised your standards. You don’t tolerate bad behavior any more – from other people, or even yourself. You hold people accountable for their actions. You don’t spend time with the “energy vampires” in your life anymore. 2. You let go of things that don’t make you feel good. No, this is not narcissistic even though it might seem like it. Self-love is success. Love yourself enough to say ‘no’ to anything that doesn’t make you happy, doesn’t serve your purpose, or drags you down. 3. You have moments where you appreciate who you see in the mirror. Ideally, you should appreciate who you see in the mirror at every moment. But even if that doesn’t happen, if you do it more than you used to, then that is success. Love yourself. You are awesome. 4. You have learned that setbacks and failure are part of self-growth. Not everyone can have success 100% of the time. That’s just not realistic. Life is about victories and losses. So look at your setbacks as stepping stones to something better. In reality, there really is no such thing as as setback. It’s all just part of a wondrous journey. 5. You don’t complain much.Because you know there really is nothing to complain about. Unless you really have gone through some horrific life experience and had unimaginable losses, most of what we all experience on a day-to-day basis is just mundane. And successful people know that. And they live in a space of gratitude. 6. You can celebrate others’ successes. Just because other people succeed, that doesn’t make you a failure. Applaud the people who rise to the top. The more positive energy you give to other people’s victories, the more you will create your own. 7. You accept what you can’t change. Let’s face it – there many things you can’t change in life. All you can change is how you view what happens. If you can change your negative perspective on situations to a positive one, then you are successful. 8. You change what you can. And let’s face it again – there are many things you can change in life. Successful people don’t sit around accepting the negatives that are changeable. They get out there and do something about it!! 9. You are happy. To me, this is the ultimate definition of success. It doesn’t matter what the balance is in your bank account, how big your house is, or how many fancy vacations you take. If you are happy, then you are succeeding in life. Even if you don’t see yourself in many of these 9 things, don’t fret. It’s okay. Be happy that you see yourself in just a few. In time, the rest will come. You just need to keep moving onward and upward. To read the full article, click here. Go out and make it a successful week! :) P.S. Oh, and if you want to listen to my first radio show, A Walk On The WOO Side, click here. The topic of the show is LUCID DREAMING. My guest, Dale Toland, explains the process and talks about his experiences. As some of you already know, I am a multi-dimensional person. In other words, I have a lot of crazy interests! Most of what I do in my 'day job' involves pretty normal stuff. I teach communication classes, write motivational articles (and blog), do TV appearances, and stuff like that. But what a lot of you may not know about me is that I am a deep thinker. I think about the strangest things sometimes. For example, as a kid, I remember having thoughts like, "I wonder if my friend Gail sees the color green the same way I see it? Or maybe she sees it as pink, but she just calls it green?" Ugh. Sometimes I make my own head hurt with the mental gymnastics I torture myself with. I could go on and on about the strange thoughts that go through my head, but then I would write a book. But let's just say that often, my thoughts are along the lines of the old question, "If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make any sound?" I blame my mother. She is also a deep thinker and has bestowed upon me a great curiosity for this mysterious world we live in. And my oldest son has the same "affliction" too. But I don't see it as a negative thing. However, I have been asked by some people (including my youngest son) if we could just "keep it simple" sometimes and talk about the weather or celebrity gossip (I do love talking about celebrities, so I don't mind that one!) :) I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm not a person who has simple thoughts. And now you're wondering what this has to do with anything? Well, as you can tell from the photo and the title of this blog, I am adding a new adventure to my life. And I'm very excited about it!! You already know what it's called: A Walk On The WOO Side. So what exactly does 'WOO' mean, you ask? Good question. 'WOO' is anything weird. And I mean anything. If it's weird to the normal person, then it's 'WOO.' Assuming that you haven't gone to the correct page on my website to see what the heck it's all about, here it is. BrainSpeak Radio asked me to start a radio show based on the article I write for their magazine of the same name. I will interview authors, experts, and regular people who have either done research, written books, or had experiences with all things "WOO." I plan to talk about things like this: psychics, energy healings, time travel, aliens, Law of Attraction, alternate realities, out-of-body experiences, and alternative medicine. And that's just the beginning. If anyone has seen the TV show Morgan Freeman's Through the Wormhole, then you have an idea of what walking the WOO side with me will be like. Just call me Carol Morgan Freeman. Ha. I couldn't resist. :) One of the things I do in both my personal and professional lives is to get people to open their minds to new possibilities. I love getting people to look at the world in new and different ways. So even though this is a slight departure from what I normally talk about, I think it's just a new avenue to do what I've always done: offer people a new way of thinking. I can't tell you how excited I am about this! I am so grateful that the amazing people at BrainSpeak found me and asked me to do this. I've always secretly wanted to get into hosting a radio or TV show ... and become the next Oprah. But maybe I'll be Morgan Freeman instead. Carol Morgan Freeman, that is. Sorry. I just couldn't resist saying it one more time because it cracks me up! Our first show should be debuting in the next week or two. But don't worry, if WOO things are not YOUR thing, I am not going to turn this blog into anything WOO. I will resume my normal motivational tips next week. So there is no need to unsubscribe if you think I've fallen off the deep end. :) But, if you are also 'Woo'-minded like me, please take a second to 'like' our Facebook page if you would like to follow me as I take a walk on the WOO side! Here is the link to the fan page: https://www.facebook.com/walkonthewooside And here is the introductory interview that I did with Peter Julian. He is the publisher and owner of BrainSpeak and also does his own show. Take a few minutes to click on the button below to listen. And please spread the word if you have any WOO friends who might enjoy the show. Get ready to embrace your INNER WOO!! |
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